Episode 4 - When Reality Hits

Welcome to the fourth episode of Mom Haven.

(It's the fourth because this is the fourth month, and I missed the third).

Thinking back, I can't believe it's been four months already – four months of consistency, intentionality, and genuineness. So I'd like to make a quick shout-out before we dive into today's rant – to every single soul that keeps pushing me to do better, to everyone who looks out for me, to those who are dedicated to every episode of this chapter in my life, to y'all who haven't given up on me, to all who believe so much in me even when I have a lot of doubts and fears, to those who never stop checking up on me, to everyone who makes sure to put wide smiles on my face every day, I say a big thank you. I do not and will never take your kind gestures for granted.

I stated in the last episode that I had to create a daily to-do list because I struggle with consistency, and some of you reached out to me with encouraging words; thank you so much. Moving forward, I have tried to do better with basic things, and I have come to realize that motherhood itself is consistency. You have to show up every day – whether you feel like it or not – to show up sane and in the right frame of mind. You can't really afford to let anything go wrong because the guilt and regret might just kill you.

One thing anyone should never do is tell a mother to calm down – as a mother, you will find yourself freaking out over the slightest things. It is so overwhelming, and I'm still struggling to understand how our parents did it like it was nothing.

Your whole life changes, and it's like you either become more of yourself or learn to change. If you are a neat freak, you'll become neater; if you're not, you'd have to learn it. The same goes for the listening ear types, the prayerful ones, or the crybabies – you will shed tears profusely for no reason whether you are the type or not.

Motherhood might not seem like much to some people, it might look easy from the outside, but when it's your nipples being sucked raw, you'll understand why there are several mother's days in a year. It requires a lot of strength, composure, and courage in every situation – it's a journey worth celebrating every day.

Accepting that your life is not just yours anymore and your body will never really go back to how it used to be might be difficult, but you should focus on the journey ahead and learn to love your new self even more. I believe I'm embracing it all quite well and doing it like a pro. It makes me really happy to get to share this journey through this blog and know that a few people actually read it.

Y'all are the real MVPs.